Change is God

Who Am I? Am I the sum of my days? My work? My words? My realizations? My nerves breaking apart?

The only thing I know is that I will never realize anything about inner peace. I won’t do that because it does not exist. It is nonsense. Just look inside and see what a bag of nothing it all is. We are fighting for racial justice today? How is that possible? Why was that not solved a hundred years ago? Pick any social issue and think about it. Why does that problem still exist? Principles of love, family, truth, all of it is nonsense.

My existence is nonsense. But I still have a brain and I can process light and heat. And so I am good – as long as there is cold beer and the promise of sex at the end of the day.

Floating in the Water

“I like to float in the water.” Michael was a long-lost friend, quiet; it was like he knew more about me that I ever would. “I just lie back and drift, you know, my nose just above the surface and look up through the water. It’s more like meditation, I guess.”

“But I can never hold it. I feel too vulnerable, like something will come up under me and bite me in half. I always freaking myself out like that.”

Rethinking Rethinking

William Cronon wrote an essay some years ago, redefining wilderness as as an “other that needs to be remembered and acknowledged.” In other words, wilderness is no longer as it is defined (an uncultivated, uninhabited and inhospitable region) but as something else; or more accurately, a tree is not a tree, but an other not with branches but more others and not leaves but more others still.

Crown Mountain: a wilderness at the edge of a city.

This rethinking has come heavily into our consciousness these days – rethinking everything from personal pronouns to the meaning of work – all of it with good intention. As stupid as it might sound, work is just that, work (an activity involving effort) and they is a plural; there is just no getting around any of this…if words are to remain words.

This trend of reevaluating words through posts and tags is a wilderness in itself with no one to curate but a group think ethos and whoever gets the most likes of all.