I already knew that Mike Myers’ $60 million vanity project The Love Guru was bad, but having stumbled upon it on late-night cable, I forced myself to watch, because it features the Toronto Maple Leafs. There’s nothing good to note – despite cameos by John Oliver, Daniel Tosh and Stephen Colbert – except that it’s over in 87 minutes.The film came under attack for its boorish treatment of Hinduism, and while this is certainly true, it’s Myers’ parody of hockey that is most pathetic. Players assaulting coaches, elephants having sex on the ice and a penalty shot with one second to play that decides the Stanley Cup are just some of the insidious details that reduce the game to Myers’ poo-poo and pee-pee one-liners. Not that this really should matter, especially in light of the Mighty Ducks trilogy. The difference here is that the Disney Corporation never pretended to know anything about hockey, while Mike Myers is not only Canadian but also considers himself a die-hard fan. Fair restitution for this abomination would be a life-long ban for Myers if not from Canada than at least from attending games at the Air Canada Centre. Or he could at least pay the buy-out on Mike Komisarek.