I’m a little worked up. I just entered the ticket lottery for the Grateful Dead’s 50th anniversary show in Chicago on July 4th…but I didn’t decorate my envelope.Yes, I realize that this thing is over-hyped and over-priced (and that the lead guitarist is Trey Anastasio of Phish and not Jerry Garcia), but the thing is I really like the music.

I’ve seen the various incarnations over the past 20 years, including Phil Lesh & Friends, Ratdog, Further and The Dead, and have always enjoyed it.

Phil Lesh and Friends plays Forest Hills, 2014

In other words, as too many have already said, I’m thinking this thing just might be epic.

And so I followed all of the directions from Grateful Dead Ticket Srvices (GDTSTOO) exactly as scripted. I wrote how many tickets I wanted (2) and for which night (July 4) on the envelope. I filled out the 3 x 5 index card with all of the required information. I inserted a neatly addressed SASE. I filled out three different money orders – for the lower priced ticket ($95.50), the price difference with the higher priced one ($120.00) and the fee for priority mail return ($9.00). (Not Fedex!!) I did all of that. And I posted it on the very first day, right behind another meticulous fan who scoffed. “We don’t have a chance.”

The only thing I failed to do was decorate my envelope, something that is stated as being “welcome”. This is where I think that I made a mistake. As one Deadhead mused on-line, “I don’t want my order thrown onto the scalper’s pile!” And while that logic might makes sense, I still don’t see why I have to decorate my envelope. I mean, I’m not a toddler, nor am I ever stoned. It just doesn’t make any sense to me. It actually seems a cult-ish, dare I say conformist, thing to demand. If you don’t decorate, we know you’re a greed-head capitalist! (Which I’m really not.)

Anyway, so I didn’t do it, and now I have second thoughts. ‘Cause, the truth is I want to be there. I have to be there! They could open with El Paso-Lazy Lightnin’-Supplication-Me & My Uncle-El Paso-Supplication-Smokestack Lightnin’-Mountains of the Moon-El Paso! I mean, Holy God, it’s possible! They really could do that! But what can I do now?

Maybe I should send an letter of apology and decorate that! What about a picture of Jerry dancing with those little bears and a steal-your-face sun above them all? I bet that no one’s thought of that!