You’re Smart. No, You’re Not.

When I was a kid, a group of teachers decided that I should skip Grade Three. Mr. Fleming took me down the hall to his Grade Four class. I didn’t understand what was going on, just that I was suddenly in another grade. There was a writing exercise, maybe a math test too. I don’t remember much about what happened, except that I didn’t spell something right – the word “sheep” keeps coming to mind – or maybe my e’s looked like a’s. I don’t remember. But before the day was over, Mr. Fleming escorted me back. I was in Grade Three after all.

I now do some work as an external grader, which means that I assess student work from schools outside my district. My grading has been considered consistently accurate over the years, so much so that they had recently doubled my work load, including re-assessing those who they thought failed to meet their standards. Recently I was promoted to team leader, an assignment that lasted less than a week when they informed me that my grading was now unacceptable. We’re sorry to inform you that you will not be able to continue your grading. We are sure you will appreciate that our first concern must always be for the integrity of these assessments.

There was no recourse, no means of questioning or challenging the decision. It was my Grade Three/Grade Four experience all over again. I had been exceptional or whatever for a day and then I wasn’t. Institutional gaslighting at its finest.